Wednesday, July 22, 2015

8 months.

Oh my angel I figure since you will be nine months old in a couple of weeks, I should probably get your eight month update blogged. I took the pictures on time though if that counts for anything..

Child, you may be far less documented than your sister, but don't ever let that be an example of our love. Boy we are obsessed with you. I'm serious. We can't get enough. We seem to think you pretty much hung the moon. I kid you not. We just love you so.

You are our cuddlebug. Our little lover. You still have to be rocked to sleep and you still prefer to nurse to sleep. I still don't know when you will pull that plug but we are trucking along. I never saw that in our future but I don't hate it. I love that time with you.

You still nurse every morning and most nights with short sessions in between if you are home with me. You love some food. Love it. You still get about four six ounce bottles a day. Maybe. You don't love those nearly as much anymore. You are all about the food.

You are about 20 pounds now and I can't remember how long. Mom fail. You are wearing 6-9 month and 9 month clothing. You are in 12 month pajamas. I recently pulled out some 12 month jammies I bought with Miss Jamie back when I was about six months pregnant. I remember thinking it would be so long until you could wear them. Jokes on me. I swear that was yesterday.
You love your people. You light up when we are around. Except for the rare occasion you burst into tears when I come to daycare to pick you up. We will call those tears of joy.

You said your first word; "Ella". It was clear as day.

No shocker that's your first word. You are obsessed with her. She is far and away your favorite person. She makes you happier than the rest of us combined. She can make you laugh for hours on end. She is always the one we call on when you need cheering up. Or when you need to be distracted. She's got that junk under control.

You are on the move. Big time. You've got this weird little worm crawl that is freaking hilarious. We've also seen you get your knees under you, but you definitely don't prefer that way.
You're after the cat in a big way. You catch him a lot too. That's not usually a good thing.
You still have zero teeth and I don't see any on the horizon.

You're still pretty much a terrible sleeper. Naps are just not your thing. You are doing better most nights but you wake up a lot. You are getting better at getting yourself back to sleep though. You still end up in our bed more often than not. Like I said, you love your people.

You know how to wave. You know how to give kisses (good grief they are sloppy!). You like holding our hands. You like to be standing.

You aren't quite pulling up but you are close.

You will sit in the middle of your crib and stare at the open door and just holler til someone comes to get you. We always do. You have us wrapped.

You can get from your belly to sitting you and vice versa.

You do not sit still. If we are on the ground with you, you are crawling on us. You will crawl after us if we leave the room. In the tub, you are trying to climb out. Or you are sticking your face under the faucet. That's an odd one. But you love it.

You are just so dang sweet. You are high maintenance like whoa, and you have a temper like no other, but you are just such a lover and a cuddle bug and the sweetest little guy. Never change kiddo. You are our heart.

Thursday, June 18, 2015

7 months.

This guy. Good grief. Look at that smile.

He's seven months old. I swear, I'm never blinking again. Because this has been the fastest seven months EVER.

You are still just the sweetest, sweetest baby. You bring so much joy to our house. We absolutely adore you kiddo. Like we can't get enough.

So you are currently 19.5 pounds. We know this because we had to take you back to the doctor last week for your THIRD ear infection. So that's fun. One more and you're earning yourself an ENT trip. Let's fix that kid. You are wearing 9 month clothing and some 12 month. You are getting BIG and I love it. I do love a chubby baby.

You are still nursing. I could write an entire post on this, but I'll summarize. My supply has really tanked (though I say that every month) but you are still showing interest, so we chug along. You get up before five every morning and come to my room where you nurse. You usually fall back asleep with me for a bit. You also nurse to sleep at night and for naps if you are home with me. I truly think it's all comfort nursing. I've slacked a lot on pumping lately, but I'm still trying. Like I said from the beginning, I'm up for it as long as you seem to need, and want, to keep at it. So we keep chugging along.

You are still taking about four or five six ounce bottles a day. You are still on all acid reflux meds. It's still controlled as well as always. You still spit up a lot but you are comfortable when taking the meds. That's the important part.

We started solids this month and you have LOVED it. Avocado is hands down your favorite, followed by toast, and eggs. Oh, and strawberries. Pretty much you love anything. We had one choking incident at a restaurant that scared your Dad and I half to death so we kind of chilled after that, but we are picking back up. You get purees at school, but at home, we do all self feeding. You're getting better though most of the food still ends up on the floor. We haven't really tried a sippy yet. Or we have, but you hated it, so we haven't pushed it. We'll try again soon.

You are really reaching for people now. Especially me. You will throw herself in my direction. I adore it.

You light up when you see your people.

You started army crawling at the beginning of the month and you've ended the month rocking on all fours and going backwards. Still no forward movement yet, but it will be soon. I'm not ready for that stage yet.

You are still sleeping a little less than 12 hours a night. You usually waking up a bit before five and come join us downstairs. You usually go back to sleep with us, but not always. You definitely get up earlier than your sister ever did. You could take a few cues from her on the sleeping thing kid.

You're still a terrible napper. There is absolutely zero schedule to your day most days so you catch naps on the go. Life is just crazy right now and consistency has been hard to come by. At least you roll with the punches well.

You are a pro at sitting up. You can also get down to your belly though it's not the most graceful thing ever.

You turn and grab for us if you see us. You prefer to be held 24/7. You are definitely my dependent baby. You love to be held and rocked. Your love language is physical touch. I'm calling it now.

We moved you to a convertible seat. No lie, it hurt my heart a little. I think I live in a current state of denial that you are as big as you are.

You say "mamamama" a lot. And a sound that sounds a lot like "Ella". We all get a kick out of that.

You are definitely a bit high maintenance little boy, but we wouldn't trade anything about you for the world. We adore you sweet boy. Here's to another wonderful month with you.

Monday, May 18, 2015

6 months.

I'm going to say it every single month, but how on earth are we already here???? I can't even fathom how your first year is halfway over. I'm going to be a disaster when you turn one. It's just going too fast.

Cooper I could go on and on about how wonderful you are. You seriously have brought so much joy to our lives. We can't get enough. But I'm pretty sure I say that every month so let's get started.

What are you up to these days? You are turning a corner and changing so much. You are sleeping through the night!! I can't say enough about how thrilled this makes me. Though.. (and I can't believe I'm saying this), I do sort of miss our middle of the night nursing sessions. Not enough to make them a nightly occurrence again, but you know.. Occasionally you will wake up once about 2 or 3 am, but that's become the exception. Finally.

You weigh 18.2 pounds and are 26 inches long. You are wearing mostly 6 month and some 9 month clothes. You still suck at napping but will occasionally take a two hour nap for me. Only me. Forty five minutes is your tops for anyone else.

You still have to be rocked/nursed/bottle fed to sleep. No putting you down awake. Sometimes I worry about breaking this habit, but not too much. We'll deal with it later. You are no longer swaddled. We just wrap your bottom half and let your arms stay out.

Still not a paci fan though I'm still trying for it. I need you to learn to self soothe! You are still nursing. Though I think it's coming to an end as my supply has taken a definite hit with all the long days away from you. But we will see. I'll quit when you do.

You've started grabbing our faces and bringing us in for big open mouth (SLOBBERY) kisses. I love them. I love this stage so much. You are just so happy and love your people so much.

You are sitting up on your own!! It's not for too long but you can handle it for a few moments. You prefer to be on your stomach more than anything when you play though. You hold yourself up so well.

Still rolling all over the place. You can get anywhere you need by rolling. You are definitely showing signs that you are fixing to be on the move. I'm so not ready for that!

You are still such a cuddlebug. I love it. It's just so different from Ella and I love that you want to be with us so much. Sometimes it would be nice to get a break but I know the day is coming where you won't sit in my lap so for now, we sit. You cuddle so much at bedtime. We just sit and rock and rock and cuddle. It's my favorite part of the day with you. You just look up at me with those big blue eyes and play with my fingers or my face. Gah. You slay me kid.

You are VERY interested in our food. We've started toying with food for you. You've had banana, avocado and one of Ella's french fries. Yea, we're a little less strict this time around. We've decided to officially go the baby led weaning route so we are getting ready to dive into that next month. I can't wait.

You are just such a happy baby Coop. You laugh the most at your sister still. You're head over heels for her. The feeling is definitely mutual. You have started reaching out and grabbing her hair and stuff which drives her bananas. I can already see how you will pick on her one day. It's going to be hilarious. Don't tell her I said that.

You love your people angel baby and we love you. Oh so much.

Monday, May 4, 2015

weekend wrap-up

Do people still do these??

I was looking back at old posts from when E was a baby and getting major Mama guilt at how little I've documented things for Cooper and am now determined to change that. We shall see I guess... Life is just so much busier now. I guess that's normal.

I spend a lot of time with both kids by myself. With B's crazy work schedule, it's just how it happens. I'll be honest, I don't love it but it's our reality so... It would be so, so easy to sit at home all weekend after working like a crazy person all week but these kids are young and active and need to get out so I force myself to get out. I'm always glad we do.

This past Saturday was the Strawberry Festival here in town. We didn't have anything else going so I figured we would head that way.

Then Cooper woke up pulling on his ear and I decided last minute we needed to go get that checked out before we left town at the beginning of the week. Last minute of course.

We pulled up to the doctor at ten til one. They close at one. I grabbed the little one and one spare diaper (ROOKIE) and Ella, and we raced upstairs. Fortunately we got checked in and all and they had time to see us. I looked down to see poop on my arm and my shoulder. Fanfreakingtastic. Of course he had had a blow out, there was no time to get the bag, no changing table in the bathroom (how is that possible?!!?!), and I had no wipes. So we get in the room where I have to clean him with tissues (NO WORDS), try to get the poop off of me (while still holding him), and somehow still wrangle Ella.

It was a disaster.

He was fine (of course) and we headed on down to the festival after leaving. Yes, with poop on the front of my shirt. I figured the Ergo would cover it.

Motherhood makes me not even recognize myself.

The festival was fun. It was hot. And I'm pretty sure Ella's favorite part was the bus ride to and from the parking area, but it was worth it. She rode one ride. We stood in line for 45 minutes waiting on that ride. Totally told her "this better be the most fun you have EVER had, and if it's not? you better tell me it was". Cooper was OVER it by the time she got on the ride. It was really freaking hot.

She got to pose in those cheesy cut out picture opportunities (she freaking loves them), we ate snowcones, played in the grass, and sort of watched a wing eating contest. It was actually fun. I'm glad we went.

Sunday we were going to attempt early church before we headed to a birthday party at 11, but that was a bust. People with young kids are pretty much guaranteed to never make anything with the word "early" in it. Just saying. But we made it to the party for E's little bff and she had a blast.

We spent the rest of the afternoon cleaning my car out. Which was beyond needed. Cooper refused to nap so we brought him outside with us and he loved it. My heart almost burst at watching the two of them play on a blanket together in the front yard. They are so great together. It's awesome.
We had a good weekend. I started Monday as exhausted as I ended Friday but that's just par for the course these days. Weekends will be relaxing again when they're in college I suppose. I'll soak them in for now.

Friday, April 24, 2015

this time around.

I knew deep down that the possibility of my second child being just like my first was pretty much non-existent.

Other than the obvious he was a boy and she was a girl, I knew that there would more than likely be personality differences. My pregnancies couldn't have been more different and I figured that was the beginning of what would surely be plenty of big differences in my children.

I could talk for days about how their sleep is different, or that he always wants to be held while she never did. Or that he is the world's most unscheduled baby while she was like clockwork. But I won't. Not today anyway.

When Ella was born, I never even considered not breastfeeding. I just figured it would be something we would do. I didn't give it too much thought it just was.

Then we had supply issues. From the very beginning. So we started supplementing from the very beginning.

Lactation people were telling me not to (emphatically I might add) while her doctor was telling me it had to be done because we were all watching her bilirubin rise and her weight drop with a quickness. So we supplemented. As I think any parent would have done.

My supply never went up. I tried. I pumped. I put her on every single time she wanted to eat. I did what I thought best for my girl. But things didn't change. She would latch on and scream and hit me with her frustration over low supply and I would cry and it was just AWFUL.

I went back to work and lugged that pump with me for three months. I would sit in a room pumping and squeezing every last drop I could out. We would nurse in the evenings but that ended when she lost all interest. When that happened, I dropped that pump and that measly 1/2 an ounce I was pumping, like a bad habit. I was free. And while I felt guilty as hell, I was also relieved. Beyond relieved.

So many people told me that low supply wasn't real. That it "effects like less than 3% of the population" and that that wasn't my real issue. That supplementing was the problem. That scheduling her was my problem. That made me feel worse than anything. I felt judged and that maybe I hadn't actually tried as hard as I thought.
When I found out about Cooper, I was bound and determined nursing would work this time. I didn't even allow anyone to buy any formula for "just in case" because I didn't want it there. I had flashbacks to Ella screaming all the time in hunger and I was terrified that would happen again, but I was bound and determined it wouldn't.

Then he was born. There was no immediate desire to nurse from him. He actually just laid on my chest for the longest time just staring at me and not making any move to nurse. But then he did. And for the next couple of days, he nursed over and over and over.

Pretty quickly, his weight dropped drastically. That word was brought up again; supplement and I wanted to scream. I was devastated.

They kept telling me that when my milk came in, things would be better. Just to give it a couple of days. So I did. But his weight kept dropping and his bilirubin kept going up. It was just like Ella all over again.

So I ordered some supplements of my own. I tried tea. I pumped after every feeding. And I drank more water than I have ever drank in my life.

I tried oatmeal. I threw any idea of a schedule out the window and let him nurse on demand. It was hourly but I was game. We were going to do this.

His weight went up a little and we were given the ok to stop formula. Almost immediately his diaper output plummeted. I took him up to the lactation specialist to see what was going on. He was getting less than an ounce off of both sides total.

I was so upset. I ordered new supplements. I pumped after every feeding. I felt like my chest may fall off but I was determined.

Through all of this, he hardly complained. He seemed content just to be that close to me. I felt like I was letting him down because my body sucked. To be honest, if he hadn't seemed so interested, I would have thrown in the towel immediately. It was so dang stressful.
Selfishly I wasn't ready to quit. I wasn't ready to give up that quiet time with him. I wasn't ready to give up how he would rub my fingers while he nursed. I just wasn't ready to stop.

So we kept at it. We would nurse and then supplement. It was working for us. He was happy, I was happy. We were good.

Now he is five months old and we are still at it. I've nursed in public (NEVER would have thought), though completely covered (my personal choice). We've nursed while walking around with him in the Ergo. It's a foreign world to me and honestly one I can't believe I'm in. I feel lucky. I do. I feel lucky to be experiencing this with him.

It's a lot of work. I've done some research and low supply is usually caused by some other medical things that I've got going on. Levels and stuff. So yay. But it's worth the work. I pump all day in the car while I'm traveling. I pump at night. I feel attached to that dang thing and I sort of hate it, but it's necessary. He still nurses in the middle of the night, sometimes multiple times a night and while people keep telling me to give a bottle then, it's such a special time and I'm not ready to stop. So we keep at it.

I don't know how much he's getting anymore and most days I think he's just comfort nursing but I don't care. I keep saying, "I'll quit when he's ready" and that's still my plan. I don't know how much longer we have of this but I'm bound and determined to see it through.

So one more difference between my kiddos. This one seems to need and want to nurse when his sister wanted nothing to do with it. If there's anything I've learned it's to just do what you need to do for each kiddo. So we do this.

And honestly, I think this is good for both of us. It's such a special, special time.


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