Wednesday, May 5, 2010

m.i.a.

I know I've disappeared, but it seems that my child hates night time and lets it know by screaming at it, loudly.

Mama is tired.

So I need advice Mamas.

I've been trying to get this child on a schedule. A feeding schedule, bedtime schedule, sleep schedule. The works.

Problem is.. she always acts hungry (she gets breast and formula) no matter how much she gets. We were given a schedule by her doc to try and get her to space her feedings out by 3 hours.

Yea right.

She practically eats the amount he recommends every hour. We are always up.

She will not go to sleep at night. I get her pretty close to out and try to put her down and in ten seconds she's screaming. Not wet, not gassy, sometimes hungry, just wants to be up.

I. Need. Help.

Seriously, I'm so tired I put my food in the pantry the other day instead of the microwave. Went to the microwave to get it out, it wasn't there. 3 hours later I found it in the pantry. Exhausted.

Any advice is MUCH appreciated. Is she seriously always this hungry or am I guessing wrong?!?

She just ate 5 ounces of formula and is still rooting for food. It's going to be a long night..

12 comments:

Mandy said...

Could you try feeding her more at each feeding? Just keep giving it to her until she doesn't want anymore? Also, maybe she is gassy. We gave my daughter Mylicon {spelling?} drops after every feeding and that really helped. I hope it gets better for you soon!!!

No Longer Newlyweds. said...

Not sure how much advice I could possibly give since I am a NEW mom just like you. But, I can pass down what is working for us.
We use Mylicon (0.3 ml) at every feeding...which is every 3 hours. We also use 3 drops of Levsin (a Rx) for stomach spasms. This combination...along with a COMPLETE switch to a hypo-allergenic formula (Similac Alimentum)...and Jude became a different child. No more screaming. No more sleepless nights. No more fussy days. We've gotten off the Levsin and just use it when needed. The Mylicon and formula will stay part of our lives until at least 3 months old.

Maybe she is having issues with your breast milk? The only way to find out is to do a complete switch and give it at least 48 hours. It's trial and error. Since you're supplementing, Ella is still getting breast milk...which could be the issue.

I would stick with your doctor recommended feeding volume of 3-3.5 oz every 3 hours. I don't think you should over feed her because their little stomachs aren't made to handle all of that yet.

As far as sleep schedules go, try and read Baby Wise. It's working for us...but, that's only because we addressed our problems from a medical standpoint first...and then when he was a happier baby, he was more likely to follow the sleep schedule.

Hang in there. You are doing a great job. These babies are hard to figure out.

Email me or text me if you need me. ANYTIME!

Kara said...

I do know what you mean about wide awake-when mine is wide awake, she wants to be with us, regardless of what time it is. She is eating 3 oz. every 3 hours and we just started that-it was 2 every 2. We have this vibrating "bouncy seat" that she sleeps in wonderfully. We have her in a onesie, swaddle her up really tight, and snap her in it. I wouldn't worry about days and nights yet, they are simply way too young to know the difference in my opinion. Sleep when she sleeps, whenever that may be, that's what I've heard. I will work on a schedule when I feel like she can go longer than 3 hours without food. We as adults know how hard it is to go to sleep when we aren't sleepy and I think babies are the same, so it's nothing you are or aren't doing. We can do this! Every baby is different, too. And yes, I give her Mylicon-generic-in every single bottle without fail, and she is on soy.

Mike and Molly Spivey said...

Does she use a paci? My lactation nurse said that alot of times they are not hungry but just have the desire to suck. So we would feed the boys, then let them suck a paci for a while.

I know this is a controversial subject with some people, but have you heard of Baby Wise? If not, I suggest you go and buy a copy TODAY! It is a great book on scheduling your baby. We did it with the boys and they were sleeping through the night by 9 weeks and were on a 3 hr schedule since day one. Some people disagree with some things in the book, but you have to read it like you eat fish - eat the meat, and throw out the bones.

Scheduling came easy for us, because I was a very "Structured, crying didn't effect me" mom. Basically we would feed the boys, say at 8 am. I would feed them, let them play for an hour, then lay them down awake for their nap at 9. They would nap and I would wake them up at 11 to eat again. I would wake them up because that will help their bodies adjust to the schedule. If they would wake up early and ready to eat, I would try everything to hold them off until three hours. Of course, I am going to be wise and if I can tell that they are STARVING then I would feed them, normally, no earlier then 2 1/2 hours. Babies are smart. If they are able to eat every hour or so they will... they will not try to go longer because they know they don't have to. If she doesn't eat good one feeding, and is made to wait a bit longer then she will eat more at the next to catch up. It will be a tough few days trying to get her scheduled and toughing it out a bit, but once her body adjusts life is so peaceful! You can sit at ease knowing that you know when she needs to eat again, instead of wondering when she will be hungry.

Please let me know if you want detailed schedule stuff. I loved doing it with the boys and would love to help you out!

hang in there - even these tired, exhausting moments are worth praising the Lord for!

Lindsey said...

Aw friend, praying you get some rest soon! Hugs! xoxox

Kristin said...

Have you tried a white sound machine or swaddling her to help her sleep?

Jessica said...

You should check out the book "the Baby Whisperer." It saved my life. And EVERY mom I have recommended it to has said the same thing :-)
GOOD LUCK!

Dan and Liz said...

I randomly came across your blog and love that you share all of this! I have a 4 month old and I always thought he was hungry because he would "root" all the time. He was NOT hungry though and I made sure not to feed him every singletime he seemed that way...it's just something they do when they are new. Using a binki/paci really helped ease my mind (we use Nuk). We also let our little Sam cry it out a couple times and I'm telling you, it worked wonders. I wouldn't recommend that to everyone, but if you keep feeding her and attending to her all the time, she won't learn as quickly to self soothe and learn that you leaving her alone is a good at night (between feedings). Depriving her of sleep is not good, so if you have to suffer and listen to her cry a bit, it's only a way of sleep training her. Our little guy started sleeping 10 hrs by 7 wks and it's because I was SO dedicated to our feeding every 3 hr (or so) schedule and making sure he was comfy (I used the mylicon drops early on) and changed...if all was good, i left him in his room and put my earplugs in...sure enough, an hour later, he was sound asleep :) It was really hard to do, but it only took a week or so for him to figure it out. Also, make sure it's not your breast milk, as that's a common problem, but at some point, you're probably just going to have to let her cry and self soothe, which will in turn teach her to sleep. I read Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child and have learned a TON. Read it if you can and GOOD LUCK!

Dan and Liz said...

Also, I don't know if you swaddle, but that is something that saved us as well. Also, if you just must get some sleep, have her sleep in a bouncy or swing until you can get things under control. :)

Lara said...

I've only been doing this for 11 days but I've found that letting her sleep beside you works to get her settled. When she's asleep, put her back in her crib and,. fingers crossed, she stays that way.

Pacifiers don't work with our baby; I think she's figured out our ploy to quieten her doesn't always lead to food, haha! But daddy puts his little finger in her mouth and she's content sucking away on it for ages. It also helps calm her and sometimes gets her off to sleep.

We have tried swaddling, but it's only worked a couple of times. If she's grumpy enough, nothing is going to stop her voicing her anger.

We've also tried putting her moses basket on a tilt (head higher than feet), like she had in the hospital, but it didn't work for long.

We have started sleeping with a lamp on at night, because she seems to get to sleep quicker that way. You would think a dark room would remind her of the womb, but sadly no. She likes to stare at things.

My midwife said that you know if she's getting too much food if she's vomiting after feeds. If she's not, then she's getting the right amount. I too am topping up with formula, because I don't seem to have enough breastmilk. I can have her breastfeeding for about an hour, then when she's still rooting I will give her 3oz of formula, which sends her off to sleep. I'll feed her every 3 or 4 hours, but I heard it's okay to feed more often if it's breastmilk. I was also advised to avoid the formula designed for "hungrier babies", because it contains more stodge and fat in the mix, so the baby will put on weight much quicker. If your baby really needs more, I was told just to give extra feeds of the regular formula.

Hey, anything that works!

~Niki~ said...

I have 4 kids and let me tell you I did it so different with the 4th than with the 3rd. My first I tended to every cry, every move, every breath. Learned that no sleep for mama wasn't a good thing for baby. So by 4th child she did a lot of crying in the beginning, but self soothing is a good thing for a child to learn. I know many are against it, but your sanity comes first to be the mama you need to be! You can try the other ideas here, yes. Swaddle, paci, etc. I think she just wants to be with mom, IMO. Which is nice, but you need YOU time too! Is hubby helping you out? By kid #4 hubby would take one night, I would take the next. So we at least got sleep every OTHER night. Even if he worked and I didn't I still made him do it. Bad I know, but still! You will end up on depression meds like I did if you don't get sleep. It's a terrible thing not to get the needed sleep. You might try pumping so HE can do more work too. Buy some ear plugs and sleep in the other room when it's hubby's turn. I would tend to wake with every cry without them. Now my youngest is 7. I had an autistic kid, he is now 9. And I tellyou he cried ALL th etime the first year! lol. How does a mom do it????? seriously, I dunno. lol. Good luck!

elizabeth said...

Not all babies like to be swaddled, but if she does I highly recommend getting something called The Miracle Blanket. It's not really a blanket, but more like a swaddler. Our little girl like to be swaddled, but I couldn't ever wrap her up tight enough. After a few nights (and trial runs) with the Miracle Blanket she went from sleeping 3 hours at a time to 8 hours at a time. It looks like a torture device, but it worked for us!

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