Friday, January 15, 2010

oh scary night....

A few weeks back, I survived one of the scariest nights of my life.

And so did the neighborhood cats. Of course, they came closer to death than they even realize.

I had gone to bed pretty early (shocker), so I was asleep when Mr. Perfect came to bed. I do vaguely recall him coming to bed and the dogs coming into the room and settling in for the night. I figured I might as well get up and make one of my 20 nightly bathroom trips since I was kind of awake now anyway.

Just as I was attempting to heave myself out of the bed, I heard this horrible banging noise. All at once, the dogs went nuts and Mr. Perfect was out of bed in less than 2 seconds. I'm still half unconscious, but I remember hearing the noise again. It sounded like an elephant was trying to come through Baby Girl's bedroom window on the front of our house.

Mr. Perfect was out of our room in seconds. Next thing I know he's back in our room hollering at me to get up that someone is trying to break in the house. He tells me to stay in our room with the dogs (who are going bat nuts crazy at this time) and tosses me a banana*.

(*Ok, not really a banana, but one of those scary, metal things that I'm not a fan of. Remember?)

Are you kidding me?

So Mr. Perfect takes off back into the hall with another banana (we are protected in the Imperfect home) and shuts me in the bedroom with the dogs with the instructions to "use all 12 rounds if anyone gets by me". OMG.

I am shaking like a leaf and can still hear the horrible banging outside and yet, all I can think about is how bad I now have to pee. I am almost in tears as I sit there and debate whether I should just chance it and go. I'm afraid I might wet myself if I stay on the floor much longer, but do I really want to get shot while on the toilet if someone does happen to get by Mr. Perfect?!

I decided not to risk it, so I sit there on the cold floor with my dogs and my banana and try not to freak out.

About 5 minutes (ok, it was probably seconds, but y'all, I really had to pee!), Mr. Perfect comes back in the room and he was pissed.

"What's going on?" I managed to squeak out through chattering teeth.

"F*&^ing (told you he was pissed) neighborhood cats are fighting on the roof and throwing each other into the window" he manages to spit out.

Once again, are you kidding me? I almost wet myself over some stray cats?!?

Thankfully that was all it was, however, I was totally terrified. It took me forever to get back to sleep that night. Stupid cats.


Jennifer said...

OMG! That would freak me out! I am so glad that y'all didn't really get broken into! I would not have been able to sleep after all of that!

So, I joined Energy Oasis on Timber Trail because I got this crazy good deal since my mom is doing The Biggest Loser Richmond Hill. I went to my training session last night and I really like it. It is small, but everyone is really helpful and it is a very nice facility. I live off of Timber Trail so it's so convienient for me.

By the way, I wanna hear baby names! :)

Mandy said...

I would have been terrified!!! So glad you are safe and Mr. Perfect was home to check it all out for you!

The Pink Chick said...

What a scary night! I am so glad that everyone is safe!

When I was little we had two fighting cats bust through one of the low windows on a set of french doors in the house. They ended up fighting on the foot of my sister's bed. It wasn't funny at the time, but I can't help but giggle thinking about it.

jen + ryan said...

oh. my. gosh. i HATE guns... i don't know what i would have done!!!

that's super scary! good to know that your husband would take charge in a scenario like that! :)

Anonymous said...

Okay, I TOTALLY get how scary that would be, but I couldn't keep myself from laughing every time I read 'bananas'.

Glad it was nothing more than a couple of crazy cats though!

SassyEngineer said...

I would have been so freaked out, but that is also so funny too! I am terrified of cats so I probably would have been afraid they would have broken the window and gotten loose in our house anyway.

Practically Perfect... said...

Oh my word - what dumb cats!

We had something similar happen once. We were asleep, when all of a sudden our dog (in the next room), started shrieking as if someone were torturing him. I was convinced that someone had broken into the house and was hurting Bear, and my husband jumped up, ran off into the night, yelling at the top of his lungs while in his underwear, all set and ready to take down whoever was in our house. Turns out, the dog was just having a nightmare! But it's good to know the guys are there to protect us, even if it's just from furry animals ;-)

In this wonderful life... said...

OH MY GOSH!!! I would have freaked out!!! sounds like you kept yourself together MUCH better than I would have!! DARN cats!!

Becca said...

oh my goodness, I totally would have panicked. seriously peed my pants at least.

Hayley said...

I read this post on my phone this morning while i was having my coffee and ....i know, i am sorry it must have been very scary...but i almost spat my coffee out I was laughing so much! Between the 'bananas and you r need to pee'...i could not help funny!

Megan said...

Oh my gosh!! That is so scary! Glad everything is ok, but I bet you were so shaken up the rest of the night!! Glad you guys are prepared!

Kristin said...

Ahhhhh, how scary. NO way would I have been able to get back to sleep!


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