Monday, June 20, 2011

greener grass.

I kind of despise the phrase "the grass is always greener on the other side". I feel like it's one of those cliched quotes that gets thrown out at random times, usually after you just poured your heart out to someone who responds with that quote.

Green grass?!? After a heartfelt admission. Shank.

I've had very, very few serious relationships in my life. Three in fact, maybe four if I'm being generous. Don't get me wrong, I dated (a lot), but very few were actually worth hanging out with for more than a minute week or so.

I genuinely loved being single in college. I spent all of high school in a relationship and when that ended decided that it was time to just have fun and figure out me. Then a friend would get into a relationship and our time would be cut in half and I would kinda sorta want what she had.

Then there were the times when I was in a relationship and all my friends were going out and having a blast while I was stuck at home watching a lame-o movie with a guy and I totally wanted what they had...

Grass, greener, much?

Last night I was stalking looking at pictures on Facebook of a friend's wedding back home, and I felt it; that pang. The pang of wanting what someone else had.

All of a sudden, I missed that early stage. I missed the showers, the total attention of being the bride, the newness of a brand new marriage. I missed the giggles of figuring out how to live with someone new, the excitement of finally being called a "Mrs.", the joy of writing your new last name for the first time. I missed the first home, the new puppy your hubs brought home, the not being able to keep your hands off each other newlywed stage.

Sigh...

I sat there last night and ached with missing that stage of life. The new home is long since gone, the puppy is a six year old dog, and the newlywed stage has been replaced by the toddler stage.

I looked around and saw the Heartguard on the counter, the monitor buzzing at my elbow, the dogs asleep on the floor, and then... I smiled.

The newlywed stage is awesome, don't get me wrong. But this? Sitting in a house with six years of acquired "stuff", two dogs and a cat who've joined the journey, a new baby, and a man who I now know like the back of my hand; this is better.

True, the nights we can't keep our hands off each other are few and far between, replaced by nights where we both fall exhausted on the couch at bedtime. And sometimes I miss the newness of it all, but we had that. It was great, but right now, there is no greener grass than what I'm currently walking through life on.

13 comments:

Lauren said...

I really loved this!!!!! :)

Ashley said...

This could not be more true. i've been having those same greener grass feelings lately. It's easy to forget to appreciate this stage in life, which, if you're like me, is where you've strived to be at for many years!

Jen Watts said...

so sweet and so true!!

Jillian said...

Such a great post, I know exactly what you mean!!

KM said...

Great Post! I know what you mean. I get the "green" feeling a lot of times too. I have it right now on the baby front. I am not rushing anything just to chase that "green" feeling. Instead I am enjoying what I do have and praying for what we long for one day!

~KM
BTW~I got your tweet and sent you a follow request. I can't tell you how many times I have blocked people when I hit the wrong button. I also got your DM and thanks for looking out for me =) I am checking into that before I start that with C.

Courtney said...

my favorite saying is "the grass is greener because it is fertilized with bullsh*t" =)

Kendall said...

I found you on Blue Eyed Bride, and read through a lot of your entries, including your daughter's 9 month post. I did this because my baby is 9 months today, and she looks a lot like yours (chub wise) so I wanted to see how they compared! My girl is also in the 95% for weight, but she is a shorty. Aren't chubby babies the best?! Oh, and we have the same crib :). I loved this post too..although we did things a little backwards and will be married in Oct. It';s def not the same as my friend's engagements, but I wouldnt trade our life for the world either :)

A.B. said...

Totally get this. THen I met a new friend at the pool and we are now "dating" and I thought of how glad I am that I don't have to do that for a man. I guess we're just lucky that way. And just think of how cute our babies are!

Legallyblondemel said...

I totally get this. I often miss the excitement, but I wouldn't trade the friendship and the true intimacy now for anything.

d.a.r. said...

God, this is SOOOO true!!

Anne said...

Wow, I really liked this. Definitely an honest but true & realistic perspective. Just another reminder of learning to be thankful and content is all circumstances. :)

LG said...

First of all, LOVE The new blog look, and second i totally agree! I do miss the newness sometimes But i prefer this stage we are at now for sure!

Heather said...

I love this post! I've been married over 16 years and now have a 10-year-old and the twin 2-year-olds and I don't think I've ever been happy. My grass is very green!

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