Sunday, June 26, 2011

leap of faith.

There's a lot going around here these days. A lot which is keeping me up really late, making me anxious wreck, killing my stomach, and all sorts of fun things. I'm not quite ready to put it all out here yet. I'm still trying to figure out exactly how I feel about everything before I hear other opinions' which will no doubt sway my feelings. Not ready for that yet.

But since there's not enough going on lately (ha), I decided to add one more teensy tiny thing.

For as long as I can remember, I've been obsessed with photography. I've been through numerous point and shoot cameras as I take them with me everywhere. I've been known to get some pretty incredible shots from a pretty cheap camera.

A few years ago, the Mister and I invested in a nicer camera that I loved. It still didn't have many bells and whistles on it, but it was a big step up from my Sony point and shoot and I loved it. Over time, it became clear the Mr. P was a much better landscape photographer while I had a bit of a knack with portraits.

I've heard for years that I should do something with my photography but never gave it much thought. Then when the opportunity to stay home for a while presented itself, I dove into reading every single thing I could on photography and as soon as we'd saved up enough money, we invested in a dream camera.

I've spent months taking more pictures of my child than I know what to do with. I practice every single second I get and when I'm not practicing, I'm reading about editing pictures, the ins and outs of the camera, or stalking photography blogs.

Recently, friends and family alike have put the photography bug back in my head. I've been praying about this to see if this is even something I could or should take on. I've been waiting for a "sign", if you will, to point me one way or the other.

The other day when I went to pick up BG's Father's Day photoshoot pictures from Wal*Mart, the lady behind the counter wouldn't give them to me. She said she had to have a copyright release since they were "professional" pictures.

Ding, ding, ding. Sign?

Obviously I got the pictures but now the voice inside my head was screaming at me to do something about this.

I have a habit of not following through on things. Or worse, not even starting them. I get scared, or nervous, or anxious and I pull out. The other night before I could stop myself, I put an ad up on Craigs*list for photography sessions and I opened up a Face*book page to start my "business".

Gulp.

The very next morning, I had an email from a lady wanting to set up a session this weekend for me to take pictures of her two girls.

Double gulp.

After I set up a session with her, I almost chickened out. As Mr. P was cooking dinner tonight, I let loose of all my fears. What if I'm actually no good at this? What if people hate my pictures? What if everyone just thinks "oh she bought a nice camera and now thinks she's a professional"??

The fear is huge. I've seen girls bad mouth other women who attempt to do just what I'm doing. I shouldn't let that stop me, but I'm the type of person who would. I've already worked myself into such a tizzy over this shoot tomorrow that my stomach is in knots and I could possibly throw up.

Fun right?

I love this. I love taking photos. I love editing photos. More people tell me I'm good at it as opposed to horrible at it. So why shouldn't I try?

Here goes; leap of faith.

If you're in the upstate South Carolina area and want to help me build my portfolio, let me know. I'll love you forever. :) If you want to "like" my page on Facebook, well, I'd love that too and let me know if you need the link.

If you think my pictures are awful or have nothing encouraging to say, well, don't. I'm giving this a shot. Encouragement only need apply please. :)

15 comments:

Jenny @ Practically Perfect... said...

That's WONDERFUL! I think it's great that you're pursuing this and wish you all the best :-)

brown eyed girl said...

YAYAY!!! That is wonderful news, girlfriend! Have fun, be yourself, and enjoy the company - my honest opinion is that when you're around people who make you smile, that comes through in pictures. Look at all of Ella's pictures - she's a happy baby with her mama, and it shows. I can't wait to hear all about it!

Good luck!

In this wonderful life... said...

I know you will do GREAT at whatever you do!!!! I think it's awesome you are willing to give photography a shot! I'm sure you will be awesome. I hope you are able to sleep and not worry soon! xo

Belle on Heels said...

you.are.AWESOME!!!

The Whity Wife said...

How brave! Brave of you to share your anxieties, and then to step past them! Bravo! No worries about your upcoming session- You are taking pictures of what she loves most- so she will love them! I wish I was closer, I would love to help you out!! If you visit Cincinnati you will have to let me know :)

Suze said...

You will do great! If you need me to be part of building up your portfolio I don't mind a bit! Send me link to your Facebook so I can like it :) oh and I am most definitely praying for you girl! :) here if you need anything!

KM said...

You will do GREAT! All your pics are always so good! Keep your chin up and do what you do best! Can't wait to hear how the shoot went. Good Luck =)

~KM

Melanee said...

good for you. i'm proud of you (and i'm just a reader), so i know your husband is super proud of you too. i wanna like you on fb. what's your page called?

d.a.r. said...

Yeahhhhh!!! God wouldn't have given you a talent if He didn't want you to use it!

Virginia Belle said...

It think the photography thing sounds fantastic! You are incredibly talented and most of all, if you enjoy it, you should definitely do it. Best of luck, I know you will be very successful!

Ashley said...

Yay girl, that is awesome!!! It is so hard to step out of your comfort zone and take on a challenge, and I'm so proud of you for going for it!! I can't wait to hear how your session goes today! If we were anywhere near you I would jump at the chance to have you take some of us!

Heather said...

Sorry to hear you have other stuff going on, but that is awesome news about starting a photography business. I wish you lots and lots of luck. Just remember it takes courage to open yourself up so you can succeed. At least you are trying and see what possibilities are in store for you. I wish I was in your area and I'd definitely help you build a portfolio with our kids, but unfortunately, I'm in PA.

Ashley said...

I think that's awesome! You do have a talent! You can take pictures of D for me! : ) Good luck!!

Mrs. Jones said...

Sending major good wishes your way! You will be great - and I hope you share a lot of the pictures with us!!!

Legallyblondemel said...

Yeah! You're a very talented photographer, and I'm so glad you're giving this a shot.

Hope all the other nerve-wracking stuff goes as well as it can!

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