leap of faith.

There's a lot going around here these days. A lot which is keeping me up really late, making me anxious wreck, killing my stomach, and all sorts of fun things. I'm not quite ready to put it all out here yet. I'm still trying to figure out exactly how I feel about everything before I hear other opinions' which will no doubt sway my feelings. Not ready for that yet.

But since there's not enough going on lately (ha), I decided to add one more teensy tiny thing.

For as long as I can remember, I've been obsessed with photography. I've been through numerous point and shoot cameras as I take them with me everywhere. I've been known to get some pretty incredible shots from a pretty cheap camera.

A few years ago, the Mister and I invested in a nicer camera that I loved. It still didn't have many bells and whistles on it, but it was a big step up from my Sony point and shoot and I loved it. Over time, it became clear the Mr. P was a much better landscape photographer while I had a bit of a knack with portraits.

I've heard for years that I should do something with my photography but never gave it much thought. Then when the opportunity to stay home for a while presented itself, I dove into reading every single thing I could on photography and as soon as we'd saved up enough money, we invested in a dream camera.

I've spent months taking more pictures of my child than I know what to do with. I practice every single second I get and when I'm not practicing, I'm reading about editing pictures, the ins and outs of the camera, or stalking photography blogs.

Recently, friends and family alike have put the photography bug back in my head. I've been praying about this to see if this is even something I could or should take on. I've been waiting for a "sign", if you will, to point me one way or the other.

The other day when I went to pick up BG's Father's Day photoshoot pictures from Wal*Mart, the lady behind the counter wouldn't give them to me. She said she had to have a copyright release since they were "professional" pictures.

Ding, ding, ding. Sign?

Obviously I got the pictures but now the voice inside my head was screaming at me to do something about this.

I have a habit of not following through on things. Or worse, not even starting them. I get scared, or nervous, or anxious and I pull out. The other night before I could stop myself, I put an ad up on Craigs*list for photography sessions and I opened up a Face*book page to start my "business".

Gulp.

The very next morning, I had an email from a lady wanting to set up a session this weekend for me to take pictures of her two girls.

Double gulp.

After I set up a session with her, I almost chickened out. As Mr. P was cooking dinner tonight, I let loose of all my fears. What if I'm actually no good at this? What if people hate my pictures? What if everyone just thinks "oh she bought a nice camera and now thinks she's a professional"??

The fear is huge. I've seen girls bad mouth other women who attempt to do just what I'm doing. I shouldn't let that stop me, but I'm the type of person who would. I've already worked myself into such a tizzy over this shoot tomorrow that my stomach is in knots and I could possibly throw up.

Fun right?

I love this. I love taking photos. I love editing photos. More people tell me I'm good at it as opposed to horrible at it. So why shouldn't I try?

Here goes; leap of faith.

If you're in the upstate South Carolina area and want to help me build my portfolio, let me know. I'll love you forever. :) If you want to "like" my page on Facebook, well, I'd love that too and let me know if you need the link.

If you think my pictures are awful or have nothing encouraging to say, well, don't. I'm giving this a shot. Encouragement only need apply please. :)