Monday, February 27, 2012

keeping focused.

I put a lot of effort into my relationships.

But sometimes not enough into the right ones.

My family and my friends are very important to me. I don't ever want them to forget that or not realize that.

The social media world is insane. Everything is right freaking there. At your fingertips. Literally. You can push a button on your phone and pull up Twitter or Facebook or a blog in less than 3 seconds. Truth be told, if it takes longer than that, I start getting antsy. Addict much?

This weekend BG and I headed down to Savannah for a bit. It's always nice to go home and reconnect with my pals down there. I love spending time with them. But I noticed something; I was doing way too much "checking in" on my phone. Checking in on my Twitter gals for updates or logging in to post a picture on Facebook of all the phone we were having instead of just. having. fun.

I get overwhelmed like whoa from blogs and Twitter. I spend way, way too much time catching up with you ladies. And I love it, because I love y'all, but some of my other relationships take too much of a backseat. And that is not okay.

I find that the energy that I used to pour into my friends and family around me, is now having to be divided so that my blog and Twitter friends get some of that energy. And that's okay, if it's a healthy relationship.

In ten years, BG and Mr. P will still be around. My best friends will still be around. But how many of my Twitter/blog friends will? I do think some will as I have managed to make amazing friends through this crazy world, but I know for a fact some won't. Shouldn't I be spending more time building the relationships I know will last?

It is easy to get your feelings hurt in this world. When one blogger gets 30 comments on a post and you get 1. When your other blog "friends" quit coming around or quit reading. When your tweets/emails go unanswered. It can hurt.

I'm ashamed to admit it, but there have been times where BG has been screaming calling my name and I have put her off to finish sending a tweet. Or finish uploading a picture to Facebook. That is not okay. My focus is clearly on the wrong relationship there.

I need to refocus. I need to remember what is important. Truth be told, I get there are people out there that don't like me. Heck, I'm sure there are people on Twitter that follow me that don't like me. That's okay. But at the end of the day, I want to go to bed happy in my relationships. Not feeling let down, or ignored, or like I keep putting myself out there to be knocked down. That's not healthy. Or fun.

I adore this world. I adore the friends I've made and I am thrilled with how much support and all I've received over the years. I'll never forget all that. And it's important to let y'all know that. It's important to give as much as I receive. And quit barking up the trees that give nothing in return. It's time to refocus on who and what's important.

19 comments:

Karen said...

Such a great post!! I've been thinking a lot of the same things lately. Although I don't blog I am on Twitter and check FB regularly. Our sweet girl is only going to be little once and I don't want to miss a single second, nor do I want to ignore my friends. Thanks for sharing.

A.B. said...

Girl, i hear ya! The important realizations... those are the most annoying :) Or maybe the most life changing!

Katie @ Loves of Life said...

I am totally. 100%. completely. loving.this.post. Just added all those periods for dramatic effect. But truly, I'm feeling very much in the same place. Just yesterday I felt God really push me to finally give up Twitter for lent. A few days late, maybe-but to give it up nonetheless. And my God...24 hours and I'm already feeling the affects of it?! That's pathetic. I am going to take this time to refocus and deleting tweetdeck, and twitter off my phone, well-that just made it easier to not non-chalantly click it. But GOSH. I swipe my phone open like 190281 times a day and think "oh. yea. I gave that up. Oops". And I feel like I'm missing everything, but at the same time, I guess I'll see how important (or not important) I am to some people. This is getting long, but last year I gave up FB for lent. Wanna know how many people said happy birthday to me? Like...2 people.outside of my family...because it was over lent and nobody knew. It was clear to me then who really cared. Meh. It's eye opening. Anyway--love this post & the self reflection.

Jen Watts said...

so much truth to this :)
sounds like you're getting your priorities straight!

Rachel said...

Great post - so true! It is so tough bc we feel so much pressure. Good for you Mama!

Jenny @ Practically Perfect... said...

Yours is the second post that I've read today about spending too much time with social media. Seems to be something that's on a lot of people's minds these days. I agree with you 100%. I try not to focus on the number of comments that I get or the number of blog followers (one of the reasons why I don't have a "followers" button on my blog) but it's hard not to compare my blog with others and wonder. Thank you for reminder!

Ashley Paige said...

such a great post, my friend and not a moment too soon. there was a lot of this talk at the conference over the weekend.. and an incredible speaker who chose to talk to us about "learning to disappoint the right people." i struggle with this daily and have been working on a post to try and get all of that out of my system for later this week. it's really eye-opening and i'm so guilty of spending much too much time with my internets than with the "3D people" that really matter the most. love you!

Maria said...

Truth. I guess it's been a blessing in disguise that I don't have a smart phone andcan't keep up with the 'internets' constantly. Also a reason why I never joined Twitter. I just wait for naptime or bedtime to plug in. Ha! I've read other posts about people trying to refocus and it is definitely something we can all do. Real friends and family deserve the best of us, our undivided attention. Good luck :)

Laura said...

Balance is definitely key and so hard to find. I have started reading less blogs and even posting less on my own. I still think blogging is very important to my life because its my me time and time to reflect but if I'm not careful it can take up too much of my time. This post definitely gives me something to think about.

Addie said...

I love this post. I know there have been times when I've done the same with my daughter, which is shameful. My phone is my other appendage. I feel lost without it. I hate being so dependent on my phone/computer. How do you find the balance?!?!

Rachel said...

Such wise words :) Let's stop being internet buds and be real friends. Seriously, we're so close...we need to plan a spring meet up!

Samantha said...

I think this is very well said, and I feel like saying, "Here! Here!" Just imagine it being said in an old English cheerio chap voice! ;)

Mrs. Pretty said...

Did you take up residence in my head today? I've felt so much of this lately, felt so challenged about keeping it all in balance, felt like some of my real-life interactions (kid included) have suffered at times . . . well said as always, Meg.

Mandy said...

This is exactly what I have been feeling recently too. Especially because there seems to be so much negativity in the blog/twitter world recently. I don't need drama like that in my life

Virginia Belle said...

I love this post. I feel the exact same way! I refuse to devote too much of my time on twitter, blogger, and Facebook and really don't tweet as much as most people do. But I am still so guilty of putting my "real" life on the back burner in order to focus on my "social media" life. Just the other weekend we had friends over for dinner and I caught myself being incredibly rude by posting a picture to twitter of our meal right at the dinner table in front of our friends. I'm so embarrassed that I did that (and I would never have considered doing that a couple of years ago.) It's definitely something I need to work on and it's nice to know I'm not the only one with these feelings!

Tiffany said...

I think that you really hit the nail.on the head with this post. I love this post and I have found myself feeling the same way.

Amy @ Forever 29 said...

I think this post, the one before and your trip to Savannah are so related. As a mom in this stage in life it's hard to do anything. It's hard to go to the park, even. And then when you do make the effort to visit family and friends you often push too hard to pack it in. I can relate so much to all of this. Striking the balance is hard...especially when your online friends seem to understand exactly what you're going through and you can reach them from the comfort of home- no dragging out a toddler, no trying to coordinate nap schedules, etc. Not to say that friends and family are not worth the effort- but this season is HARD. Period. Hugs to you for finding the balance :)

Katie @ Modern-Day Family said...

You have a great way with words! All of it so very true.

Megan said...

Yup! I understand completely! It's just so easy to get sucked into isn't it?? I've been working on cutting back just for the fact that I feel like it takes away from my "in person" relationships.

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