Thursday, June 21, 2012

sometimes change is a good thing....

Anyone that knows me at all, knows I'm not a real big fan of change.

I tend to do this thing where I over think things and usually not in a positive light.

I tend to dread change. I manage to take all the bad aspects of any upcoming change and dwell on those and magnify them in my head so that the upcoming event is suddenly so terrible that I absolute dread it.

True story.

The good thing is, in my somewhat advancing age, I've come to realize all of these things about myself and can now recognize that I'm doing it and can sort of make myself simmmer down some.

Sort of.

There's been a lot of change around here lately.

My brother met the girl that he decided to spend forever with. They got engaged. They announced they'd be having a baby. They got married. It was a lot.

Now these are all great events. Awesome events really. But the part of me that is terrified of change could only see one thing;

I was losing my brother.

He was quickly growing up and moving on to a real life of his own and I knew that the days where we were bff's and roommates and party buddies were drawing to a close.

Although they've been closed for seven plus years already, in my head they were ending. Now. Because of all that darn change.

I knew I was doing it. I knew that I'd taken these life altering events and turned a negative spin.

He was getting married so he would never be around at holidays anymore. He was moving to the beach so he'd be too far away to see us. He was having a child of his own; a family of his own and our time with him would be non-existent.

I do not pretend to be rational. I know I'm insane.

Talking to my dear friend D one day, it hit me what I was doing and so it was at Christmastime that I decided to just let it go.

I would quit thinking the worst of my soon to be sister in law. I'd stop panicking over losing my brother. I'd stop freaking worrying. Oh, and I would be nice if it killed me.

And guess what? I realized that I actually liked my soon to be sister in law. I realized that I was excited for BG to have a cousin. I realized that I still am bff's with my little brother and the life we'd planned, to grow up and have family vacations together, was actually well on it's way to happening.

Funny how that happens.

Now change still terrifies me, but y'all, sometimes? sometimes change is a good thing.

And when change comes in a tiny little 7 pound 1.1 ounce, 20 inch bundle of newborn sweetness?
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it's a fantastic thing.

We got the call that Miss Adalyn (AK from here on out) was on the way the morning after the wedding in Charleston. So we decided to make a detour and head to Mr. P's parents for a bit before hitting the beach to meet our new niece.
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We weren't there long when we got notice that she was here. And she was perfect. I can't even explain what I felt knowing that my little brother (who will always be a tow haired little nuisance) was now a Dad.
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Wow.

Unfortunately, Kiki (my SIL) was having some BP issues afterwards and did not feel well and BG couldn't go back to meet the baby, so we didn't stay long. But we did get to meet her, and hold her, and fall head over heels in love with her.
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She's so perfect y'all. She's the perfect addition to our family. She's the perfect little one to make us an aunt and an uncle and my sweet BG a cousin. This change? this change is such a good thing.
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6 comments:

Laura Graham said...

So sweet ! Congrats on that new neice!

Mrs EyeCanSee said...

Awww. Congrats Auntie!! Don't think of it as losing your brother. Think of it as gaining a niece! {and a sister in law too!}

Erica said...

Congratulations to your family. So exciting to have a new member! :)

Sara said...

Congratulations! And, that last photo of you is gorgeous!

Sara said...

Congrats, Auntie! Being an aunt is the absolute best! I'm so ready for my little brother to have a baby!

Britt said...

Aww Congrats Aunt! That's so sweet. She's adorable!

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