what had happened was...

So about two weeks ago, we got a phone call. And just like that, our world was flipped upside down again.

About two years ago, we moved from my beloved town of Savannah up to the Upstate of South Carolina. I went willingly because we had no choice, but my heart was definitely a bit broken at leaving the place I loved so, so much.

But eventually, I found that my visits back to Savannah were becoming just that; visits. I went from saying I was going "home for the weekend" to saying "we're heading to Savannah for the weekend". Which is a slight change, but it says so much.

Eventually the little town we live in now became home. I fell in love with it. I love the area, the people, BG's school, our church, and so much more. I turned blog friends into real life friends and made other very dear friends. I like my co-workers, I like BG's friends; I just really like it here.

We started telling our parents that this was where we would be; for good. We were settling in. We were getting comfortable. I really, really thought that this was where God wanted us to be.

And then two weeks ago, we got a phone call. And just like that, our world was flipped upside down. Again.

Mr. P no longer works for the same company that he was working for. The details aren't important (and aren't my story to tell) but that's the gist of it. And that sucks.

So now we're at a crossroads. Fortunately, my husband is amazing and has already secured work. He takes his job as our provider seriously and for that I'm eternally grateful. But... that work, more than likely will be taking us from our beloved little town.

I would be lying if I said that my heart doesn't hurt. Like I said, I love this place. I truly, truly do. But I'd also be lying if I said that I wasn't scared of what's next. And why can't our "what's next" be right here?

I know that there is a plan in all of this. When we moved here two years ago, we were a lot different than we are now. Over the past two years, we've grown significantly in our faith and in our relationship with each other. We've done a lot of growing and changing and it's all been for the best.

So I know that whatever happens next, will eventually be for the best, it's just hard to see right now.

There's so many more thoughts in my head right now. I burst into tears every single time I think about tearing BG away from her beloved friends and her school. I tear up thinking of leaving three ladies that have become very dear friends of mine. I tear up when I think of leaving the place that I've grown to love and the place that really turned the three of us into a family.

I don't know what comes next. Our prayer right now is that God will open our eyes to what He has in store for us next. A small part of me is terrified that we're going to make the wrong decision. In the past few days I've thought that maybe coming here wasn't God's plan and that's why He closed the door so quickly. And I'm terrified to mess up again.

I know now that the time we spent here was God's plan. Just that maybe it's time to move on. As much as I am not sure I'm ready.

We have a couple of options of what happens next. We've been spending lots of time in prayers trying to discern God's will on what our next step will be. Right now? I feel like I'm hearing radio silence. Sigh.

So that's where we're at. We may be moving. We may not be. We have no idea. So if my head is a mess these days, this is why. It's all a little scary and a lot unknown and I'm doing my best to not let my anxiety take control.

Thank you all for the continued prayers.