super high and then down low.

So we all know that parenthood has it's ups and downs. It's highs and lows. It's a fact. They are both totally going to happen.

What is insane is that in a 48 hour period, you can have both. The extreme of both. It's exhausting. And slightly painful.

On Saturday, the day pretty much rocked. Tiff and I met up semi-early and got the kids packed up to head down to Columbia for Hayes' birthday. Both kids were excellent on the ride down and were perfectly content to watch Diego with no sound so that Tiff and I could gab our heads off with non baby talk for a while.

The party was so fun. I always enjoy spending time with Erin and her family and this time I lucked out and got to meet Rachel, a long time blog pal, and Katie, a newer blogger that I'm lucky to have gotten to know. It was a great afternoon watching the kiddos play and spending time with ladies that I truly enjoy being around.

The margarita didn't hurt either. Cinco de Mayo for the win.

The car ride home was blissful as both children were out before we even made it out of town. It was quiet. Other than BG hacking up her lungs from a nice cough she's rocking again, but you know. Quiet.

Tiff and I made dinner plans for that evening as we watched our crazy toddlers run around my house. It was a heart so full day (even though dinner didn't happen and I had to eat Cince de Mayo dinner with just le toddler).

As she settled down to bed that night, my heart was so full with how much fun we'd had that day. She'd been so good, she'd loved on the other kids, she was nice to the adults and was pleasant at dinner. Days like Saturday make me think that maybe I am doing okay with this parenting thing.

Not even 12 hours later, I woke up with a pounding in my head and an elephant on my chest. Nothing like starting the day with an allergy attack to get you going on the right foot. Mr. P gave me a Zyrtec which quickly set me up with that "cotton balls in my head" feeling that absolutely sucks.

BG and I didn't make it to church and we spent the next eight hours at home, without Mr. P, just trying to survive. She moved from activity to activity as I followed along in a half drugged, half just plain sick state. She was whiny and discontent to let her Mama rest and not entertain her. I was strugglin' ya'll. We were not seeing eye to eye with anything much.

Eventually we moved outside to the pool with some ice cream in hopes of just five minutes of quiet to rest my eyes.

It didn't happen.

By the time Mr. P came home, I was about as close to tears as one can get without actually sobbing. I was spent.

I climbed into bed Sunday night feeling defeated. Where was my high from Saturday? Where was the Mom who was rocking it and had such a happy kid on Saturday? How could we have such a great day followed by such a bad day??

Monday dawned bright and early and she and I managed to pick right up where we left off on Sunday; totally on the wrong foot with each other. I dropped her off and ran to work with a skip in my step at knowing that for at least the next seven hours, there was no toddler to yell and scream at me. It was going to be awesome.

Well that seven hours did the trick for us. Because when I picked her up, she was overjoyed to see me and threw herself in my arms. We made a quick visit to Daddy and then she and I ate burgers and fries in front of the tv for dinner.

There was still a good five meltdowns before bedtime, but as we sat, her in my lap for the first time in so long, and watched some tv before bed and let her wind down, I felt it again; that heart so full feeling from Saturday. I pushed a sweaty little curl off her face and sighed. Those moments aren't free. The highs are paid for with the lows. And the highs? I'll take the lows just to get those little joys.

project 366: week 18

Sunday, April 29th:

BG has taken to biting her fingernails here lately. In an effort to curb that, I decided to paint her fingers and toes with "Princess" polish so that they'd be too beautiful for her to bite. Not sure that that worked, but my girl sure did enjoy her first little pedicure.

Monday, April 30th:

The little one was slightly sluggish on Monday morning as we were getting ready for school. Her teacher told me she wasn't slowing down any at school but then I got this with the caption "first one to sleep. That NEVER happens!". Whatever was bothering her that day is completely gone now though.

Tuesday, May 1st:

Looking super cute before school.

Wednesday, May 2nd:

I came home to this on Wednesday. Apparently Mr. P had picked up this little toy from Target and was so excited to show BG that he had picked her up early from school and already had her out there when I got home. Yes, her suit is on backwards...

Thursday, May 3rd:

Her "cheese" face. Love.

Friday, May 4th:

With her buddies at school. Kid is such a ham.

Saturday, May 5th:

BG and I rode with Tiff and T down to Columbia for little Hayes' birthday yesterday. I'll let his Mama show you pictures first, but this one ought to speak for how much fun they had.

life this side of two.

I'm not quite sure what I expected of Baby Girl's second year.

Okay, that's not true. Everyone has heard the rumors; the terrible two's. But I got to be honest? So far..

two is not terrible at all.

Now I do know the karma of the Internet and I'm so going to be blasted for that as you always are when you brag on your children and their eating, sleeping, or potty training (it all stops when you say it's going good people), but I'm willing to take my chances to brag on how good these days are.

Because when they do turn bad, I want to look back at this wistfully and sigh... and remember how good it was before karma got me.

Two so far? is kind of awesome.

This little person is just so stinking cool y'all. You can have conversations with her. She sings and dances with me. She laughs at my jokes. She makes jokes of her own.

It's like she's a real girl.

She does things like crawl in her old cradle as we disassemble it with her baby bottle and blankie and pretends to be a baby again. She laughs when we tell her she's silly and then she hams it up even more.


She plays in her room. Not always so quietly, but she'll go in there and entertain herself for a bit. Albeit, some days "entertaining herself" means pulling out every single book she owns and making a total mess. Whatever. I'll take it.


She's independent and has a mind of her own and she isn't afraid to show it. Which is why sometimes her bow doesn't match her clothes. She insists on wearing a bow, but she gets to pick it out. That's fine by me. I like a girl that knows what she wants.

She'll go outside and paint and for a few seconds (the longest she sits still), I can see the concentration and thought she puts into things and I know she's going to be great at what she does. Because she tries; hard.


She sings when you ask her to sing you a song. And she gets most of the words right. And even when she doesn't, it is still the most perfect little song sung in a perfect little voice.

She loves school and adores her friends and teachers, but her favorite people on the planet are still her Daddy and I. We still trump the rest and she lets us know it with lots of hugs and sweet kisses.


Life this side of two is really kind of awesome. I know they're going to get tough again, because that's what toddlers do, but right now? these days rock.

so what?

Today I'm linking up with the awesome Shannon from Life After I Dew for So What Wednesday. Because I can. This week I'm saying so what...

if I've already started packing for our beach trip next weekend? And we don't leave til next Thursday? I might be excited okay.

if I signed up for Weight Watchers again because I don't have any willpower when left to my own devices. Oops.

if I'm super disappointed we'll be out of town for one of BG's best pal's birthday parties. I'm super bummed we can't go.

if I considered (for like half a second), coming home early from our beach weekend just to make said party. It's her best pal y'all :(

if my timeline for Baby #2 is quickly approaching and I am still not on board quite yet...

if I've gone to bed at 5:30 pm and 8:00 pm so far this week. The headaches have been out of control lately.

if when I get my first cavity, I get three at once. And then get them all filled at the same time. Go big or go home I say.

if I'm still not sure I'm completely okay with all the big changes going on these days.

What are you saying So What! to this week?

her turn to rock it.

There was a day in high school that it would not quit raining.

It was my senior year and I was super bummed about the crappy weather because I had a soccer game that afternoon and I wanted to play. I was pumped.

Somewhere in the afternoon the rain stopped. It was up to the coach to make the call if the field was playable for the afternoon or not. So during my gym period, he and I walked down to assess the damage.

The field was a mess. It really was. On the surface it looked okay, but just below, was mud and basically a slippery disaster.

Being the person that I am, I put reason aside and said "I think it's doable Coach".

I actually still suffer from that waytooexcitedforcommonsense disorder.

He looked at me and agreed. I'm guessing he really wanted to play too.

If you think about it, we would all be in cleats and plus, who doesn't like getting all muddy and gross during a soccer game?

Well actually, I really don't... But whatever.

The field was fine for a while, but after just a bit of play, it very closely resembled a pig sty. It was bad. Girls were slipping and sliding everywhere. But it was still doable.

Then it happened; I got the ball and took off for the goal. I lined up and planted my left foot and shot with my right. The goalie came barreling toward me and dove.

And she couldn't stop.

Thanks to the ridiculous conditions of the field, she slipped across that grass at lightning speed and her entire balled up body didn't stop until it came to rest against my locked and planted left leg.

The pain I felt in that moment was the worse I had ever felt. I've actually only felt that strong of pain twice more in my entire life and once was childbirth.

Yea. It was bad.

But what that day did for me (besides taking me out the rest of my senior year), was scare me. And make me super aware of my knee.

I had a brace fitted for college that was supposed to "help", but in truth it freaked me out more. Psychologically I thought that thing was a sign of weakness; that people would see it and go for that knee. So two games into my freshman year at college, I ripped off my (very expensive custom made) brace and never looked back.

Sorry Mom and Dad.

But the fear was still there. It took a lot for me to stick my foot back in to get a ball or to take a shot again. I was terrified.

To this day, I'm obsessed with how easy it is to tear a knee. Watch a sporting event with me. I cringe more than a gambler. It's bad. But it freaks me out.

It's the same thing with raising a child.

I know all the dangers and scary things in life. I've seen them. Heck, I've lived through a ton of them.

I know what different experiences can do. How they can damage a person. How they can destroy you.

How on Earth am I supposed to let my sweet, innocent, precious Baby Girl out in a world like that?

For her to feel that kind of pain? To get knocked down? To get hurt?

Eventually, I threw caution to the wind and played like I'd never been hurt before. And that, is probably what kept me from getting hurt again. Because being timid? or reluctant? That gets you hurt faster. Going in to a play with your entire thought process and heart? Keeps you safe. Keeps you focused.

I can't be terrified to let her try things. She's going to have to live like I did. Throwing herself into different activities and experiences to find what she loves. To find what she's good at. I don't want her timid and afraid to try. That's how you get hurt. That's how you miss out.

Once again, I'll be a spectator. Cringing as she hits opposition or falls down or gets hurt. But, I also know enough to remind her to keep trying. To get back out there. To go full force again and find something you love. To quite literally, stick your foot in. That when you put your heart and soul into something, you might get hurt. But you also might not. You might score a goal. You might just rock it.